


Save Me From This Trash

by ashilrak



Series: 177(6) [18]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Background Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette/George Washington, F/M, M/M, Nonbinary Character, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2016-06-21
Packaged: 2018-07-16 12:19:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7267870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashilrak/pseuds/ashilrak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tailorsoldierspy: omfg they’re not even arguing for real they’re rehearsing an argument for in front of the class</p><p>Nelsonma: I FUCKIGN KNEW IT</p><p>Doriber: i’ll admit I wondered. They rhyme. I mean, that wouldn’t be that weird from alexander, but from thomas? He’s not that creative</p><p>Angelsky: i can honestly say i’ve never put that much thought towards it</p><p>Jdotlaw: wait do u think they just rewrite debates they had </p><p>Lagayette: that would 100% be something they’d do</p><p>Colderthancold: what class is this for</p><p>Tailorsoldierspy: idk what class do they have together that they’d argue in publicly</p><p>Morelikedamnilton: literally any class</p>
            </blockquote>





	Save Me From This Trash

**Author's Note:**

> John Laurens = Jonathan Lawrence = Jdotlaw  
> Hercules Mulligan = Hercules Mueller = Tailorsoldierspy  
> Lafayette = Paul Motier = Lagayette  
> James Madison = James Mercury = Mamjer  
> Aaron Burr = Aaron Alston = Colderthancold  
> Angelica Schuyler = Angel Skylar = Angelsky  
> Elizabeth "Eliza" Hamilton nee Schuyler = Elizabeth "Lizzie" Skylar = Morelikedamnilton  
> Maria Reynolds = Maria Nelson = NelsonMa  
> Theodosia Prevost Burr = Theodora "Dori" Bercer = DoriBer

**Tailorsoldierspy:** Guys I'm walking behind alex and thomas right now and they don't know

 **Mamjer:** They don't know you're there or they don't know they're walking together

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** they don't know I'm here i get to watch them in their natural habitat

 **Jdotlaw:** keep us updated

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** what do u think I'm doing u fucker

 **Angelsky:** calm down my man

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** hmm

 **Lagayette:** they're both wearing their coats, right?

 **Mamjer:** I know thomas is, i don't think he's worn modern clothing in weeks

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** i only made him two outfits

 **Mamjer:** i stand by what I said

 **Jdotlaw:** ew

 **Nelsonma:** my main questions in regards to this is how the hell does alex manage to style his coat and make it look somewhat decent?

 **Morelikedamnilton:** i don't know

 **Angelsky:** he's wearing like it with skinny jeans and a sparkly gold scarf and a t-shirt and i don't understand how it looks good?

 **Jdotlaw:** it's cuz he's magic

 **Lagayette:** u don't get the point I'm trying to make

 **Lagayette:** they match

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** omg ur right

 **Mamjer:** thomas is completely aware of this I promise you

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** he is walking awfully close

 **Nelsonma:** it's alex's charm; u can't resist it

 **Doriber:** u can def resist alex's charm

 **Jdotlaw:** i get what ur trying to say but also u've never been alone with alex

 **Colderthancold:** I firmly believe that if he tried, you'd love him too

 **Doriber:** too?

 **Mamjer: @colderthancold** r u in love with the man u killed

 **Colderthancold:** can we seriously move on from that I made a mistake

 **Jdotlaw:** you made many mistakes

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** ALEX JUST TRIPPED OVER A ROCK

 **Lagayette:** omfg

 **Tailosoldierspy:** jefferson hasn't noticed yet and is just talking and gesticulating to air

 **Angelsky:** ooooh gesticulating that's a fancy word herc

 **Morelikedamnilton:** IS ALEX OKAY

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** considering the fact that he still hasn't stopped talking, I'm sure he's fine

 **Nelsonma:** has thomas noticed yet

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** yeah, he's trying to help him up now

 **Jdotlaw:** that's not gonna go well

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** "omg jefferson i am perfectly capable of helping myself off the ground"

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** “sure u r hamslice”

 **Jdotlaw:** jefferson calls alex hamslice ? ? ?

 **Mamjer:** I think it’s his way of stopping himself from saying hamilton all the time

 **Lagayette:** does he say hamslice when he masturbates

 **Colderthancold:** wtf **@lagayette**

 **Lagayette:** Don’t speak to me like that

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** they’re arguing

 **Morelikedamnilton:** about what

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** omfg they’re not even arguing for real they’re rehearsing an argument for in front of the class

 **Nelsonma:** I FUCKIGN KNEW IT

 **Doriber:** i’ll admit I wondered. They rhyme. I mean, that wouldn’t be that weird from alexander, but from thomas? He’s not that creative

 **Angelsky:** i can honestly say i’ve never put that much thought towards it

 **Jdotlaw:** wait do u think they just rewrite debates they had

 **Lagayette:** that would 100% be something they’d do

 **Colderthancold:** what class is this for

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** idk what class do they have together that they’d argue in publicly

 **Morelikedamnilton:** literally any class

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** damn they’re getting into it

 **Angelsky:** what are they arguing

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** financial plan?

 **Colderthancold:** I thought alex wasn’t allowed to argue the financial system anymore

 **Doriber:** That just means it’s not for Washington’s class

 **Lagayette:** They only have one class with Washington anyways, and I have it with them

 **Angelsky: @lagayette** doesn’t he have office hours rn

 **Lagayette: @angelsky** ur right i shall talk to u all later

 **Jdotlaw:** G R O S S

 **Nelsonma:** they didn’t say anything dirty tho

 **Jdotlaw:** BUT THEY WINKED AT ME WITH THEIR FALSIES AND EVERYTHING

 **Jdotlaw:** THEY PRIMPED FOR GWASH

 **Jdotlaw:** S A V E ME FROM THIS T R A SH

 **Angelsky:** u r literal trash for alex u have no room to talk

 **Morelikedamnilton:** neither do u shit ang

 **Jdotlaw:** i am also trash for lizzie we cannot forget the queen

 **Morelikedamnilton:** <3

 **Nelsonma:** does that make alex king

 **Doriber:** lol no lizzie is queen, and john and alex are her consorts

 **Nelsonma:** can I be your mistress

 **Morelikedamnilton:** we’ll talk about it

 **Nelsonma:** :*

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** do u think if I start beatboxing that they’ll start rapping

 **Jdotlaw:** omg

 **Mamjer:** can u video it

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** o h m y g o d

 **Nelsonma:** what

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** some total sorority girl just went up to tjeffs and ham and not only did she interrupt them while in the middle of a (rehearsed) argument, she asked them if they’re d a t i ng

 **Morelikedamnilton:** NO

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** they looked so taken about

 **Mamjer:** did thomas blush

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** YES HE DID It was almost adorable especially bc he then looked at alex and then got even more flustered and embarrassed

 **Nelsonma:** was alex giving tjeffs the look to fuck w the girl

 **Tailosoldierspy:** Yes he did and now tjeffs is just looking real interested

 **Jdotlaw:** tjeffs is not allowed to be a part of the poly squad sorry but no

 **Morelikedamnilton:** ^^^

 **Angelsky:** ur not missing out on anything

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** S H IT alex is looking consideringly at tjeff’s back

 **Mamjer:** STOP THAT

 **Mamjer:** it’s bad enough with just thomas

 **Mamjer:** we don’t need hamilton getting curious

 **Morelikdamnilton:** i rly am fine with that being stopped rn

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** it’s fine now they’re back to “arguing”

 **Nelsonma:** is it sexually charged

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** perhaps not the words I’d use to describe it, but there’s definitely something

 **Angelsky:** how r u able to notice all of this ur huge and they should have seen u by now

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** what part of spy do u not understand

 **Jdotlaw:** but back to the important things

 **Jdotlaw:** try beatboxing

 **Morelikedamnilton:** wouldn’t they you know, notice???

 **Jdotlaw:** this is alex - he’s arguing, he’s not gonna notice

 **Colderthancold:** but it’s rehearsed

 **Jdotlaw:** that doesn’t change all that much to them let’s be real

 **Angelsky:** but how do they decide who wins

 **Nelsonma:** maybe they freestyle the end?

 **Doriber:** lol that’s why alex always wins

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** omg guys it works

 **Mamjer:** for real?

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** i actually cannot believe it but it is happening in front of me as we speak holy gizmo

 **Angelsky:** gizmo

 **Tailosoldierspy:** gizmo

 **Morelikedamnilton:** like how rhymed is it?

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** “a civics lesson from a slaver hey neighbor ur debts r paid cuz u dont pay for labor”

 **Jdotlaw:** they’re just full on recreating their old debates aren’t they

 **Jdotlaw:** there is literally no subtlety or attempts at modernizing that

 **Tailorsoldierspy: @mamjer** bitch u ain’t even here and u just got rekt

 **Mamjer:** huh?

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** “madison u mad as a hatter so take ur medicine damn u in worse shape than the national debt is in”

 **Jdotlaw:** why did I not realize that alex could totally rap

 **Morelikedamnilton:** y would we tho

 **Jdotlaw:** bc about what half he says is fuckign poetry and i once saw him write u a seven page love poem in like ten minutes and if he can do that he can freestyle

 **Colderthancold:** you’re 100% right

 **Doriber:** it’s not wonder that “i have to think everything over twenty times before I say it” lost literally every argument ever to him

 **Colderthancold:** aren’t you supposed to be on my side

 **Doriber:** lol

 **Nelsonma: @doriber** <3

 **Doriber:** <3 **@nelsonma**

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** wait guys lol alex just ripped over another rock

 **Mamjer:** is he okay?

 **Doriber:** is he actually tripping over rocks or is thomas tripping him in an attempt to romantically catch him as he falls

 **Morelikedamnitlon:** who the fuck even does that is that an actual thing

 **Doriber:** not all of us were figuratively swept off of our feet at a ball eliza

 **Doriber:** some of us were married and needed a stronger nudge in the right direction and a more literal approach

 **Jdotlaw:** are u telling me that burr literally tripped u in order to get ur attention

 **Nelsonma:** more importantly **@colderthancold** does thomas kno u did this

 **Colderthancold:** yes, yes her does

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** what the fuck burr

 **Colderthancold:** my name is not even burr anymore what the hel

 **Jdotlaw:** u answer to it

 **Colderthancold:** one day someone is going to ask for a Mr. Alston and I’m going to be confused and it’s going to be your fault

 **Morellikedamnilton:** who’s mr. alston

 **Colderthancold:** literally me

 **Morelikedamnilton:** that’s definitely not your name

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** omgguysguysguys gUYS

 **Jdotlaw:** W H A T

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** JEFFERSON JUST PICKED ALEX UP BRIDAL STYLE

 **Nelsonma:** and alex is just letting that slide ?

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** i think alex might be in shock bc wtf

 **Morelikdamnilton:** thomas isn’t? allowed?? to do that ? ? ? did he even ask permission

 **Jdotlaw:** N O i certainly don’t have any recollection of that heppning

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** lol alex just jumped out of tjeff’s arms and fell flat on his face into the grass

 **Doriber: @jdotlaw @morelikedamnilton @nelsonma** look at the actions of the man ur obsessed with and think about it for a moment

 **Nelsonma:** lol u’d be obsessed too if u knew the sort of things that boy could do with his hips

 **Mamjer:** this is thomas’ fault, don’t blame alex

 **Jdotlaw:** even madison is on our side, surely that means something

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** lol guys alex is just spewing insults now and jefferson is just looking at his ass

 **Angelsky:** I'm not even surprised any more

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** "you vain doghearted dewberry"

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** what the fuck even is a "doddipol-jolthead"

**Author's Note:**

> lol tjeffs/aham is not endgame
> 
> alright so i literally just have paper scattered all over my bedroom with random notes written on it (one of my darlings [nocturnal_leanings/classicalcassiopeia/Bronwen] told me that i am literall aham with 700% more self-control so i'm just kinda rollin' with it lol but like at work i have a really boring office cubicle and i'm tempted to just take all my papers and notes for this story and pin them all over lol (but seriously if any of u have inspriational quote/general art/fanart recommendations to decorate my cubicle with to make it less sad send them my way 
> 
> "jefferson and hamilton are going to fight in the middle of the campus, aren't they. like not a "hamilton punches burr during orientation" fight more like "two freshmen are duking it out in period costume while simultaneously debating the pros and cons of an agricultural farming society and screaming old-timey insults" fight” - arcane adagio

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [She wrapped me all up](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7383517) by [DonOsservatore](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DonOsservatore/pseuds/DonOsservatore)




End file.
